Bad parenting vs. Good parenting

When did it become so fashionable to be a bad parent? While chillaxing on Facebook the other day I noticed an interesting discussion on a friend's wall. She was griping about a fellow mother who was talking at a gymnastics class, complaining about how she felt SOOO bad about letting little Johnny (or whatever) watch television for 30 minutes every day while she made dinner. My friend was annoyed by this- I know I've felt similarly before. Her thread began getting many, many responses, then moms jumped in saying "Yes, and she probably cloth diapers, eats no processed food, and eschews epidurals". Oh boy.

I understand the view point of my friend: Who hasn't been annoyed by someone who seems to be holier than thou, or little miss perfect? But, I became rather agitated by the open bashing going on in the thread. When did it become a problem to try to live your life in the best way you possibly can and raise your children according to your ideals- whatever those may be? Why are we so insecure in our own childrearing that as soon as someone raises a question or comment like the tv during dinner woman, we raise our hackles, and the whole pack jumps on her like ravenous wolves. Not to her face of course, because then we wouldn't be nice girls. TV during dinner woman, for all we know, was just looking for some friendly reassurance: Yes, it's okay to have the television on sometimes, it will not ruin your child, you are okay at this parenting business. Parenting is hard enough on its own without adding in the worry that not only are people going to judge us if we mess it up, they're going to judge us if we get it right for our families.

We're all trying to do our best- let's not get caught up in the idea of who is doing a better job. Be comfortable with your own choices- and if someone says something, it doesn't hurt to assume the best. I know in my family, good parenting includes cloth diapers, not too much processed food (don't take a look at the Halloween goodies in our house right now, though!), homeschooling, and VERY limited screen time. But, that is just a snapshot. It's what is right for our family right now, not what is right for your family, or even for ours in 5 years. Go right on ahead disposable diapering, public schooling, Kraft food eating, and enjoying the Disney Channel. It's no skin off my back. Oh- and if you're feeling guilty about your kid's screen time, just be glad you're not one of the 30% of parents of preschoolers who have a television in their 2-6 year old's bedroom. But, that's a whole separate can of worms, and something I actually AM opinionated about!